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Not My House
Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0.02 Just following orders.
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Glad You’re Here
Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0.02 Tech support for friends: a Möbius strip lined with razor wire.
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Remember Your Password
Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0.02 It’s getting harder for me to tread carefully around my dear friend, That One Guy, hence the photo. For the lulz, here is how my day went this...
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Driver
Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0.02 Usually they ask about the delivery charge (with which I buy gas and which is therefore not a tip). I’m not sure who she thought the tip would...
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Veteran
Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0.02 Homeless people are fascinating. Especially the ones named after animals.
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Pregnant
Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0.02 You sperms can just back right off. (My friends ask me this a lot, usually when I’m inordinately happy about something and/or stuffing my face.)
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UTI
Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0.02 Not pictured: Me helpfully gesturing downwards with both index fingers, thereby indicating “Universal Technical Institute.”
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Extreem Chicken Salad
Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0.02 Inspired by The Rebel Chick, I developed a seething urge to create my own chicken salad. I went to my favorite fruit-n-veg place yesterday and...
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Diarrhea
Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0.02 Fill out your admission form with care. Your health care professional is judging you.
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A Funny Story
Last month, I decided to kill myself, finally. Having once again sabotaged everything in my life and left myself on the verge of homelessness with a spectacular mental illness flareup, I discovered a...
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What Fire?
You know how there are always TV commercials and websites and ads and all manner of publications and flyers out there about how “There Is Help” for people who are struggling? Yeah, about that. I have...
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Limbo
My Internet at the house finally got shut off today, but it’s okay since it won’t be my house much longer. I’m posting from a library. The landlord has moved for summary judgment against me, so it’s...
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For Dummies
I have a temporary roof over my head, for the next couple of weeks. A young couple graciously took me in with the understanding that it would be for a specific, short term. It’s nice to have a bed to...
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Boobs
I went to the beach yesterday. I was very careful to apply sunscreen to my Irish bod, except, apparently, to my chestal area. Oh well. I’m quitting my job. Because I’m smart like that. You may already...
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Swallowing
Predictably, I was hired on the spot during my interview yesterday. Like I said, I interview well. I start on the 29th. Which is kind of too bad because I was informed this morning that I have to be...
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Empty
I find it utterly baffling that so many people in my life seem to think I’m doing fantastic, when I feel like I’m sinking deeper and deeper. It just seems like all they can see are the things on the...
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Hole
Remember all that “progress” I was making a couple of months ago? Yeah, about that. Predictably (to me, at least), I broke down awhile back and became unemployable once again, which means no more...
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Dent
I sometimes wonder if I’m somewhere on the autism spectrum, because I take great and prolonged comfort in sameness. Ever since I was a kid, I would read favorite books over and over and watch VHS...
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Baggage
When I was eleven and in the sixth grade, my mother packed her bags and mine and took me away to escape from my father. It occurs to me that this would nowadays probably be referred to as a “parental...
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